One day I'll be on the news...

"Mother leaves children home alone, story at eleven."

During the Christmas break, a break that I am probably the only parent around these parts sorry to see come to an end, it was necessary for me to leave the children home for a few hours while I did my thing at the office. I figured Sarabelle, at 13, is capable of handling herself for a time, Gracie, when she is not arguing with her older sister is reasonably responsible and able to care for herself, and the two of them together could join forces and tag team Elle to keep her under control.

That's exactly what they did.

I left clear instructions that nobody was to call me at work unless it was an emergency, in which case 911 should also have been called, and that they were to keep a hawkeye on Elle and redirect her attention if she got into any mischief. After several unsuccessful attempts to curb Elle's misbehavior, they hog-tied her with the remainder of a roll of tulle used to dress up some Christmas packages. They were so proud of their efforts they bragged later, "We fixed the ribbon so that if she tried to get away it gave her a wedgie."

Pretty good engineering, I thought.